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Tuesday, February 21st, 2006
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3:28 am
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Short update due to incredible fatigue:
*Played Warhammer 40K with Casper today and lost atrociously. It was a small comfort that the two amall units that survived his first two rounds managed to defeat a third of his army.
*Watched 'Walk the Line' for the second time, with AJ this time. I maintain with my previous assessment: the movie is simply brilliant and Reese Witherspoon certainly deserves the showers of awards she's been receiving for it. (I actually purchased the soundtrack the other day, just cause I needed to have the Phoenix&Witherspoon version of Dylan's "It Ain't Me Babe")
*Participated in the quiz today, but didn't do overly well. With just 4 of us this time (of which AJ and I ran in late after the movie). We scored 27/40 (for Hinze's benefit: 7,5,6,5,4), but since the winning team had 33/40, it's not that bad - there were some really obscure things there.
Anywho, that's all for today. Talk to y'all soon.
Today's insight: In WH40K it makes all the difference who gets to start.
current mood:  tired
current music: Jenny Lewis - Handle With Care
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| Saturday, February 18th, 2006
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6:20 am
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| Wednesday, February 8th, 2006
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3:23 am - Pub Quiz!
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Just a short update to let y'all know that we, in the guise of our quiz-team The Undead Pints, equalled our all-time record of 36/40 last monday with only 5 people in the team! Michael, Lily, ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) hollandman, Daniel (left during round 3 and was replaced by Hans), and myself were the Pints tonight. We ended shared 3rd (to think that we won once with 35/40...) and were very close to winning the tie-break. Naturally, we didn't win any bonus prizes, but that is to be expected. Hopefully, we'll do as well or better in two weeks time, hopefully back on our usual 7 members with Thomas and foreignkid bolstering our number.
In other news, I revamped and digitalised the budget I made a few weeks back today. Taking my debts and bank-overdraft by the horns, I'm aiming to be completely debt-free (and having covered the overdrafts on all my bank-accounts) by June 1st, while purchasing a new computer and acquiring my driver's license. This, of course, entails the mind-numbing step of going to the bank tomorrow to cover 1186.79 Euros of that debt, killing me a little inside, but I believe I'll be sleeping a lot easier without debts gnawing away at me. This is the first actual budget I've ever made, let's hope I can keep to it for a while ;)
Well, that's all I had to say right now. I'm gonna crash now: have a bit of work to do tomorrow -couple o' interviews and a draft for a feature- and am finally going to see 'Walk the Line', should be awesome :)
Alon
current mood:  accomplished
current music: Johnny Cash - The Man Comes Around
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| Friday, January 27th, 2006
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3:28 am - Existential Quandries (or: Pitiful Meaningless Existence)
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And now that I have your attention...
Anyway, hey! Some of y'all might be pretty surprised and disappointed to hear that I am -actually- still alive and didn't end up drinking the last vestige of existance living somewhere in a ditch (with an OWL!). So, sorry to disappoint you.
So yeah, I'm not going to actually try to get my vast audience up to date with the doings that have been transpiring in my life in the past, well, eons, because it would take far too much time and by the end of it you'd be so bored, you'd actually welcome a swift, painless death. Suffice to say that I still live with the same three friends of mine and still work for the same newspaper. 2005 has not been the best year ever - it was filled with a lot of drama and, mostly, stagnation. Worked a lot but not enough, barely studied at all, barely got anything done at all. On the flipside, I went to Israel, the UK and the States twice each since my last update, had my share of one-night stands and brief romantic interludes (but nothing really serious). I got to write some really cool articles and got quite some recognition from them. I even got back in touch with some friends I hadn't spoken with in ages. It'd be unfair of me to say that my life is anything short of awesome, but yet I find some inherent feeling of not being quite content with it creeping up on me as of late.
And this brings us to the immediate catalyst to my typing up this message. I take it some of y'all might at least have an itch of curiousness as to why I'm sitting here at 3am writing this entry after a year of inactivity, so it's only fair to address that. Well, I had a talk with my housemates today about what to do when our lease ends in a couple of months. After some shuffling of feet, we all decided that it was probably for the best if we didn't continue this living arrangement after that - that we'd all go our seperate ways. Mind you, we all had a really great time living together and it'll be something that I, for one, will always remember fondly, but I guess the time has come to, well, move on.
Oh, it might well be that two of us do get a place together (probably Karel and Cazza in that case. Perhaps I'll get a place with one of them, but that seems unlikely right now) but this is definitely the end of an era for me. Until my 16th I lived in a full house with differing permutations of people but generally at least 5 other people). Then I went to college and lived in 'units' of 6 people and afterwards moved to places with always at least 2 other close friends. I've never really lived alone and, frankly, the thought scares me to death. I might want to consider getting an apartment together with another friend (Hinze? ;)) or perhaps my sister, but the community-life I've been living all my life is definitely at an end. Many of you might not understand why this is such a big deal to me, but to me it's really the end of an era. People always say that "college is the best time of your life" and I've managed to stretch that for a good couple of years. But now the time has, finally, really come to grow up and become an adult.
This development has also forced me to re-assess the priorities in my life. I've come to the scary realisation that the main thing I've been doing these last few years is relish in constancy and comfort: I've been trying to enjoy the company of whatever people were around me as much as possible and haven't at all been forcing myself to the extents of my abilities. I guess psychologists would say that because of the constantly changing realities and uncertainties I endured in my childhood (particularly with my parents' divorce and bla bla bla), I have a need for a constant environment with people around me all the time. But I haven't really been focusing on myself in, well, ever. Now that I will be living by myself or, at most, with one other housemate - I guess I'll need to start doing that.
So the thoughts are popping up in my head: what do I want to do? Do I like my job enough to make it my career and put myself 100% in that? Do I really want that degree I've been chasing for so long but never had the discipline to get? What do I really want out of my life? I get job offers from corporations quite regularly through my contacts (the current one being from Google). Doing an office job would set me up financially - something I've longed for ever since my early-childhood wealth and splendor turned into my late-childhood abject poverty. But what do I do when I get home then? I just spoke on the phone to my friend Taylor who just made that choice and learned that when he comes home from work he just reads a book or rents a movie before heading in for the night. That kinda makes me wonder "what's the point?". And from that stems the thought "what can I think of that /does/ have a point?" - overly existential of the teenage angst variety, I know, but I can't exactly hem my mind in, now can I?
The problem is that there isn't one thing I'm really, really good at, and I'm not sure that there's some cause or vocation I'm passionate about enough to dedicate myself to. I guess the 'cause' I care most about is the well-being of 'my country' (Israel), but do I really have what it takes to dedicate myself to a life of service in politics or the military there? Come to think of it, of the three career-paths I've considered these last few years (journalism, politics, military/intelligence), is there any one that I feel passionate about? I can't really tell right now. In politics, I've always been torn between Israel and Holland and also have no clue whether I can deal with all the wheelings and dealings that rear their ugly heads there. Journalism is awesome, but it's such a life-encompassing profession that never goes to sleep. It's ever-changing, yes, and that's what draws me to it, but it's a boatload of work for little to no recognition and even less glory. And the military just doesn't seem like a good place to be right now.
What else do I like? I've always been incredibly passionate about making music, but, even though it's a childhood dream, I don't think I'm up for the life of a musician even if I were good enough to embark on it, which I'm not. I love games: board games, computer games, roleplaying games... But do I really want to take something that is basically a distraction from real life and poised at kids and escapist people like myself and make it into a vocation? And literature. I'm a pained enough soul to write, but I don't have the stamina to be a novelist, nor do I have that spark of creativity that a writer needs to rise above the teeming masses of middling colleagues. Every now and then, an average writer hits a goldmine, like Dan Brown, but that's a rarity. And do I really want to sit in a hypothetical loft writing in the spare hours of whatever oddjob I happen to hold at the time, hoping for my big break? I really don't think so.
So, what /do/ I want? My answer to that question has always been 'to be happy', but what does that proverbial, undefinable 'happiness' entail? I guess that can best be described by the Dutch idiom "Huisje, Boompje, Beestje" (Little house, little tree, little animal): a house in the 'burbs with a white picket fence, with a loving wife and a couple of kids, some pets, a garden, plenty of friends around and a financially and intellectually rewarding job. If that job happens to be the benevolent dictator of the known world, that's a nice plus. But pursuing relationships for relationships' sake is never a good (or particularly successful) idea, and what that job would be is an even bigger question. Ruling the world remains my goal, but it never hurts to have a Plan B. I probably really do need to get that degree, but I just don't know if the motivation is there for it, y'know?
That's quite a lot of meandering, self-glorifying nonsense to stem from one lousy decision on my housing, I know. And I know that it's really not all as dramatic as I make it out to be, and that moving out of this house doesn't necessarily mean all of the above needs to be decided this instant, but now seems as good a time as any to finally grow up. I'm 23 (an age no one likes you, if Blink-182 are to be believed, and why would they lie?), not 18. Time to quit acting like an 18-year old.
Well, that's it. Thanks for sitting through this ordeal. I'm sure you probably skipped whole portions and I can't really blame you for that. Sorry that I made it this absurdly long and boring, and sorry at that for just vanishing on everyone a year ago without a trace and then suddenly return with these idle ramblings. I can't promise that I'll write frequently again, but actually I can really see myself using this medium a lot more over the coming weeks and months - you have been warned. Anyway, if anyone has any thoughts or comments, I'd be happy to read them :)
Y'all's,
Alon
current mood:  nostalgic
current music: Social Distortion - When the Angels Sing
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| Wednesday, December 15th, 2004
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9:02 am
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It seems Lily is right: I'm allergic to getting older :-s. It's been a whole year since last I was ill (last time being between just before my birthday and Christmas) and yesterday, I spent my birthday being more than slightly ill - the flu or the cold, one of those two annoying buggers. And just now I awoke from what must be the worst night's sleep ever slept by a mammal on this planet :(.
I must give Marjolein lots of thanks for really doing everything humanly possible to ensure I have a nice birthday throughout it all, and actually succeeding in part :).
Well, now I'm off preparing the last session of a long-running RPG, a session we'll be playing tonight. Bit first, maybe, I can get some actual sleep.
current mood:  crappy
current music: Ears Ringing...
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| Monday, December 13th, 2004
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1:48 pm
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4:00 am
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Had an interesting day today:
I went down to the mystic land below the rivers to watch Marjolein's brother give a guitar recital. I even remember to take my shots before I left civilization ;) *hides from Nele*. The recital was okay, but everything around it was great. I had a great time talking and spending time with all of Mar's family (mother, father, brother and sister) and generally just having an excellent day off - one that was easily worth the 5.5 hours of transportation I had to do for it, of which one-and-a-half hours in a train where the heating didn't work (and thus mainly featured people huddling under their coats in foetal-position).
In the trainride back (the one /with/ the heating), I spoke to my sister for over an hour on the phone. I have to say this was probably one of the more enjoyable phone-conversations I've had in many months and it makes me very happy to see my sister and I get closer. Especially seeing as things aren't going that hot for her right now, I'm really happy we actually got a chance to talk. I haven't been there for her much over the last few years, but I hope to be able to change that from now on :).
Something completely different: Over the last few days I've been feeling quite shitty and downhearted about my social-life and the lack thereof. Being cooped into this apartment -as awesome as it is- has started to seriously gnaw on me, as has the fact that I've failed to make actual friends among my new study-mates, even though the opportunity was totally there. Also, the fact that I haven't been on a date or anything of the sort for about two months is tough for me (I haven't been girlfriend-less this long since I was 17!), and what with most people around me having active social-lives and/or girlfriends - that all can get quite annoying. However, the reason that I don't have any of that is that I chose to, for once, dedicate myself to my studies and my career - and though I debated it over the last few days, I decided that I still support it whole-heartedly: It's about time I did something with my life, methinks.
I know that in all this, my friends have had to 'suffer' by my almost-complete lack of contact from my side. For this, I truly apologise. I know I haven't been the best of friends lately, and just hope that you understand that the time has come for me to take my studies seriously for just a bit - and that it's enormously hard to juggle a full-time job with a full-time study. When things get a bit quieter, I owe each and every one of you a couple of beers, so we can catch up in good, time-honed, relaxed, Dutch fashion.
Well, that's it for me for now. Happy Channukah to all you Jews, and -in case I don't manage to write a post before it, due to Marjolein's visit, work, my birthday, RPG (running the last session of a long-running game), study, work, partying, packing, work, being in the States or work- a Merry Christmas to all you gentiles ;)
p.s. Alkaline Trio rocks! :) (or should that be: 'The Alkaline Trio rock!'?)
p.p.s. My iPod (named 'Calliope') rocks teh besto!! (or should that be: 'iPod r0Xx0rzZ my S0x0rz!!!11!!oneone!!!!!!eleventy-one!!11'?)
current mood:  good
current music: Alkaline Trio - Radio
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| Tuesday, December 7th, 2004
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4:34 am - In Other News
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*Having installed WinXP to acoomodate my new iPod, I still hate its guts. Making it look almost exactly like Win98SE - that paragon of freedom amongst Microsoft other tyrannical ploys - makes me feel slightly happier in a small act of rebellion. Also, I countered this downgrade of my system (WinXP) by installing a new HDD which triples the size of my storage and a new video-card, which octriples the memory on my vid-card.
*In research for my Military History-paper -I was looking up the report of the Battle of Lutzen (1632)- I accidentally ran across the etymology for the Dutch saying 'to know one's pappenheimers' - strange things, these weird connections.
*In similar research, I learned that only 919 people need to disappear in mysterious circumstances for Beatrix to become Queen of England, Scotland and Wales (and thus, technically, Australia, Canada and -if we're fair- the USA). Get started already, Bea! What are you waiting for?
*I'm going to visit Taylor, Jessica and Lindsay in Texas for Christmas and New-Years! Since this is my last chance on a holiday between now and next summer (when I'll hopefully have graduated), I'm really happy that I managed to arrange myself a vacation!
*Best of all: I just learned that my oldest friend (as in: longest time befriended) -and one of the people I care most about on this entire planet- is now engaged!!! I'm just filled with joy for Michael and his bride to be, Miriam. So, here's for them:
CONGRATULATIONS MICHAEL AND MIRIAM!! :D
You guys are great and are so incredibly good for each other that it's just amazing seeing the two of you being happy together. I'm really looking forward to your wedding already, but try and give me some time to think of the most awesome present in the world EVER, which is only fitting to give to a friend who's helped me through most of the roughest times I've been through in my life. Congrats again, guys, and I hope to see you guys when you're here in January (after I get back from the States)
Love to everyone,
Alon
(better known as Alon Primus Dei gratia rex Terrae, magnus dux Lunae, Stupor Mundi)
current mood: ecstatic
current music: America - Horse With No Name
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4:32 am - Bow down before me!
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 | You scored as Luxurious Upper Class. As a member of the upper class, you will always have the satisfaction that there are many underneath you to slave for your every need and want. Live the high life.
Luxurious Upper Class | | 83% | Upper middle Class | | 71% | Middle Class | | 50% | alternative | | 42% | Lower Class | | 8% | </td>
What Social Status are you?
created with QuizFarm.com |
[edit: okay, I admit - I tweaked the answers a bit to make sure I didn't end up with the sweet and sappy Middle Class... Okay, so I tweaked them a lot. But isn't cheating just part of the Upper Class-ness?]
current mood: aristocratic
current music: Murder by Death - Those Who Stayed
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| Wednesday, December 1st, 2004
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2:46 am
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| Tuesday, November 23rd, 2004
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3:28 pm - I have no life
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| Saturday, November 13th, 2004
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7:59 pm
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| Thursday, November 11th, 2004
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12:36 pm
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As much as I don't want to discuss politics, it would just be wrong of me to contain my glee at the passing of Yasser Arafat. The only sad part about it is that I won't get to see him hang for all the Israeli and Palestinian lives he has on his conscience and all the grief he's caused to countless more. I must confess to be surprised that he died: it would have been more fitting to see horns spout from his towel and his legs to erupt into goat's hooves - but you can't have everything: At least the Palestinian people will now have an actual chance at the peace and the state they richly deserve.
In other news, my grueling week of exams is finally over and I'm pleased to say I think I passed everything. :)
Now, if you'll excuse me: I have a couple of weeks worth of sleep I'd like to catch up with
current mood: good
current music: Iron and Wine - Such Great Heights
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| Thursday, September 30th, 2004
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1:30 am
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You have been warned, puny mortals!
current mood: amused
current music: A Fire Inside - The Leaving Song
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| Monday, September 13th, 2004
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2:48 am
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| Saturday, September 11th, 2004
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4:45 am
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current mood: amused
current music: AFI - Paper Airplanes (Makeshift Wings)
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| Monday, September 6th, 2004
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11:13 pm - Aargh! Normalcy!
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I'm being forced into a straightjacket of normalcy, people, it's terrible. My housemates all go to sleep at 11pm at the latest now that they're working, and I live in the middle of nowhere, so I can't just go out or visit other friends... What this comes down to, my fine body of friends, is that I end up living the same, damned healthy lifestyle as well... I'm actually quite tired now. NOW! It's barely 11:15pm now, and I'm tired! What with my work being done, nobody being on MSN and the internet being dull it means that sleep is kind-of the only option I have at this point in time... How sad is that?
I wish I was at the College Bar...
Alon
p.s. In better news, my classes actually went quite well today: With a modicum of luck and a lot of will, I might actually be able to get decent grades this quarter *gasp*
p.p.s. I don't want y'all to get the idea that I'm blaming my housemates, cause I'm not: First of all, it's not their responsibility to provide me with entertainment. Second of all, I'm glad they have jobs/things to do. Lastly, it's actually good for me to wake up at a decent time in the morning. ;)
current mood: tired
current music: Yellowcard - Life of a Salesman
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| Sunday, September 5th, 2004
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10:35 pm
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Shamelessly leeched from jasmine
In other news: After a year's absence or so - I'm going back to school tomorrow!
current mood: excited
current music: Beatsteaks - Atomic Love
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| Wednesday, May 5th, 2004
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4:46 am
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Tonight I DJed at the party-night in the UC-College Bar. Now, the fact that I was at the bar on tuesday (party-night) is quite remarkable in itself - seeing as I tend to avoid it like the plague considering the type of music that is played there normally: I hadn't been there in a good 5 months or so.
DJing is something I really like. I'm not particularly good at it, but I like it a lot. Today I took over the music from another DJ who was sent away by the BarCommittee on account of playing really crappy music and making people actively leave the bar. When I took over (as a personal favour to the president of BarCo more than anything else) at a quarter to 3, the dancefloor was empty and had been so for the previous half an hour or more. My job was just to play an hour's worth of music and mollify the people a bit (the bar was set to close at 4). I'm very proud to say that from the moment I took over until past 4:30, people were dancing non-stop and were sad when the bartenders finally called a halt to it all on account of wanting to go home themselves. I played everything from Justin Timberlake to Me First & the Gimme Gimmes, from Moby to the Guano Apes, from OutKast to Guns N' Roses, from Christina Aguilera to Alien Ant Farm to Punjabi MCs to Goldfinger. In short, I played music that I don't necessarily have to like myself, but that I knew would get people to dance. If I want to listen to music I like all the time, I could just sit at home and listen to it. But when working as a DJ, it's one's job to play the music the crowd wants to hear. Also, I take requests and play them. Even if I despise them, I make someone out there happy by playing them, and if the rest of the dancefloor tolerates it I'll even leave it to the end of the song. All those compliments and requests to come back and play some more music next week and the week after do a lot to a guy's ego, I can tell ya :)
In short, my day started out really, really crappy. Then I had a really great and enjoyable evening followed by this wonderful night. Totally sweet :D
current mood: chipper
current music: Alien Ant Farm - Smooth Criminal
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| Friday, April 30th, 2004
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11:56 am - Queen's Day
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Happy Queen's Day, everyone! Today is the national holiday of the Netherlands: Supposedly the queen's birthday, but actually the birhtday of the queen-mother, who died last month (it would have been her 95th) and the day the current queen acceded the throne 24 years ago.
Now, Queen's Day in the Netherlands is well-known for it's so-called 'Free Market' - everyone is allowed to sell whatever they feel like on the streets (except for some types of food). Traditionally it's lots of fun but, for some reason, I've had quite a crappy time at it the last few years. My original idea was to stay locked up in my room all day, but I suppose I'll talk to my friends hollandman, 21stcenturykid, foreignkid, Hinze and Hans and see what they're up to. This country goes wild at Queen's Day, and I don't think I have the patience for stupid people wearing shocking orange and going crazy today.
Well, seeing as I haven't updated seriously in a while, allow me to recap some of the things I've been up to over the last few days:
Last tuesday, I was awoken by my friend Jonathan saying "We're almost at your place, could you give me some directions"? Now, I knew that he was going to come over at some point during the week, but nobody had bothered to tell me that it was tuesday. Joni and his sister Daphne are together with silentskye my best friends in Israel and (though I wasn't sure at first, seeing as I hadn't seen them in a long time) I was looking forward to seeing them. After he got here, he told me that a mutual friend who I also hadn't seen in ages had invited us to a party. When I asked about it, he said it was sitting in someone's garden with a coolbox of beers and some music playing, that quite some old acquaintances would be there, etc. I agreed to go up to Amsterdam with him, only to find that what the girl had meant was some dance-event at the Amsterdam Stopera where DJs were playing dance-music and dancers were strutting their stuff in the windows.
If nothing else, it allowed me to crystallise why I don't like dance-music. You see, the music was actually not bad: Very good beats and a smooth, refined sound. So, why do I dislike the music, then, I was wondering. I think the answer is this: It's not really music to me. I like it for what it is, but what it is, is nothing like music to me. I take music very seriously, too seriously perhaps. Music is art for me, it's emotion. It's heartfelt lyrics penned down by someone who actively feels them, then read by someone (preferrably someone close to the writer) who lets him/her-self be inspired by the lyrics to write music which evokes the same set of emotions and finally played by people (again, preferrably the same people who wrote the lyrics and music) who put feeling into their playing - I think it's very possible to hear by the way people play their instruments whether or not they care about the song. Music is an art and should have beauty and profundity at its heart: 'Art pour l'art' (art for art's sake). By this reasoning, I can accept that some rap and hip-hop artists are fantastic artists and musicians and respect them as such - even if I don't particularly like the sound of their music. It doesn't need to be really deep or serious: it needs to be real. But music that's basically just an electronic compilation of lots of computerised standard sounds made with the intention to be remembered for a month or two until the next lick comes out doesn't qualify. It may take quite a lot of skill in its own way - making music that drags people to the dancefloor and makes their bodies want to move - but it doesn't belong the artform 'music' that encompasses everything from the early classical geniuses (usually no lyrics, but tons of emotion, art, skill, beauty and eternity) to modern artists like Coldplay, Radiohead, Thrice and AFI, but even like Eminem and OutKast. By the same reasoning, I don't think pop-music that sounds nice but is mass-produced and only gains popularity by its image and its commerciality qualifies as music. Someone like Max Martin (who is a genius in his own way) writing lyrics about feelings he doesn't feel but knows that kids will eat up by the millions (and not care if they make sense or not), and sung by some bimbo (m/f) who looks nice and can sometimes sing a bit(optional) carried mainly by a sexy music-video just doesn't cut it for me. All I can say is that time will judge what's memorable and timeless and what isn't.
Wow, I really didn't intend for the last paragraph to be that long. I was going to write about the performance of 'Casper and the Burninators' last wednesday, but I'm going to take a break from writing first to give my wrists (still angry at me for excessive bass-playing) a rest. If I don't manage to get back to writing today: Have a wonderful day! :D
current mood: pensive
current music: Deep Purple - Smoke on the Water
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giddy